Do you ever feel as though you’re your own worst enemy at times? Like if you could just give yourself a break and speak kindly to yourself, your world would be infinitely brighter?
When I really stop and think about it, it seems strange to me that I’d occasionally have negative thoughts about myself. Why on earth would I do that to the person who’s feelings matter most? I should be constantly nurturing her and comforting her and patting her on the back for all her hard work.
And I mostly do these days…
But every so often that mean girls’ voice will pipe up, ever so softly but loud enough to be heard. It will say things that make me second guess my decisions and make me feel as though I’m not doing enough, not succeeding enough, not striving enough…
It’s too exhausting to feel this way and to have negative thoughts.
Do you agree?
It’s also limiting and prevents you from living to your highest potential. That is why these days I follow these 7 steps to a self-loving life, and remind myself of them as soon as my mean girl voice pipes up in her unceremonious way.
7 Steps To A Self-Loving Life
1. Make a list of all the awesome, amazing, wonderful things about YOU. This is one the exercises I have in my Falling In Love Again eBook. I have my list stuck up in my office so I can remind myself daily of my awesome gifts and qualities.
2. Do some mirror work. This most definitely feels a bit icky at first, but stick with it. If you have negative body image this exercise is a MUST. The aim is to stand naked in front of your mirror and appreciate you and your beauty. The challenge is to not pick at the things you don’t like, and instead only say kind, loving things about your body and face. Give it a go.
3. Respect your emotions. If you’re feeling sad, frustrated, angry, confused etc, don’t numb these feelings and push them under the rug. Hear them, respect them and use them as messengers and allies and then release them. If you hang onto your emotions, they become lodged somewhere in your body and this disrupts the flow of energy. When you distort that energy field, you eventually start to have problems because you begin to distort the tissues within the body, and over time, this can lead to dis-ease. Your thoughts create your emotions and your emotions create your behaviours, which leads me to the next step…
4. Speak to yourself as you would to a best friend. Would you tell your bestie that she’s un-loveable, ugly, stupid, not good enough, not thin enough, not pretty enough? No. No you would not. Become your own best friend. If a mean girl thought pops up – silence her with positivity and love. Reflect back on step one and remind yourself of your amazing-ness.
6. Follow your joy. Nothing reflects self-love more than doing the things that bring you happiness and joy. What do you love to do? What are your passions in life? What makes you excited and energised? What do you like to do to spoil and treasure yourself? Write them down if you haven’t done this exercise recently, and put a plan in place to start doing more of these things daily or weekly.
7. Be grateful – especially before sleeping. Did you know your subconscious mind in 1000 times more powerful than your conscious mind? I know, mind blowing huh? What if you could flood your mind with positivity, happiness and gratitude before hitting the sack? Imagine for a moment how that might affect your subconscious mind. My guess is pretty powerfully. Every night before sleeping, try writing at least one thing for which you are grateful for and 5 reasons why (the power is in the detail).
I’d love to hear from you – were these steps helpful? Have you got a friend who might benefit from these steps? Why not share the love. Click share below 🙂